My hand turned me down
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
