Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
