i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
