hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
sarcasm needs its own font
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
