why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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