So drunk its hurt
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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