Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
