Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
