that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize
