this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
