And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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