So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
and you fell through a lawn chair
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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