Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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