Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
