it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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