3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
