She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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