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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.

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• (518): View more from New York

  Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower

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• (707): View more from California

  They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.

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• (631): View more from New York

  It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.

  (727): View more from Florida

  Who says it wasn't?

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.

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