It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
