I like my sex mixed with concussions.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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