That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize