Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
