Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize
