this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
i need some magic done to my vagina
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