Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
