She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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