so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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