After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize
