Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize