ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
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