I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I love you.
Bad choice
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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