I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
