If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
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