So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize