Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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