Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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