I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
So squirting runs in the family.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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