hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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