At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
