I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
