honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
