The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
did i walk over a car last night?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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