at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
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