Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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