goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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