??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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