You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
