omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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