How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
