You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
