David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
